[Note: Bear with me here at the beginning. The second half is better than the first].
Conventional wisdom says that a well-balanced meal contains all the major food groups. On the contrary, nutritional research indicates that nutritional balance just isn’t necessary during each meal. Balance among the food groups isn’t even necessary over the course of a day. In fact, nutritionists generally believe that while a diet might not be balanced with regards to a particular day, what’s important is that nutritional balance be achieved over the course of a week (or even two).
What does nutritional balance have to do with life balance?
Just as nutritionists have rethought nutritional balance, I’d like to propose that we start . . .
Rethinking Traditional Life Balance and Honoring the Seasons of Living
For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; A time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; A time to mourn, and a time to dance; A time to keep, and a time to throw away; A time to tear, and a time to sew; A time to keep silence, and a time to speak . . .
-Ecclesiastes Chapter 3
Just as balanced eating doesn’t require that every meal contain all major food groups, balanced living does not require that every day include a “proper” amount of sleep, social time, spiritual time, work, and play. What’s important is that we get what we need from life, when we need it. What’s important is that we achieve balance over the course of weeks, months, years, or even a lifetime. What’s important is that the seasons of life balance each other out on our time-frames.
I think it’s also worth discussing how . . .
Perceived “Balance” Can be Maladaptive
In past posts I’ve observed that people who hate their jobs need an airtight productivity system to keep them on task. Likewise, if any one aspect of your life (i.e. your relationship, job, etc.) is “off” or ill-suited, then you’re going to need some serious compensatory balance. If your job sucks then you best hit that treadmill (to relieve stress), surround yourself with great friends, and spend a lot of time meditating (a lot). These elements of balance can help you compensate for, or mask, non-ideal situations with other positives.
Living in Seasons
Some of us manage to get up each morning at 4:00AM, run, meditate, work for 8 hours, and then come home for dinner with friends and family. Still, others wake up, work for 18 hours straight, and then spend a few hours with a spouse and children. So while some of us manage to integrate multiple facets of living during each and every day, others tend to do their living in seasons.
For people taking the seasonal approach to living, balance can mean spending 9 months working our assess off, followed up with a 4-month travel binge (and perhaps returning home to pursue a heightened social life while our work lives run in the background). In fact, I’d go so far as to say that…
It’s entirely possible to work 16-hour-days for 3 months straight and still live a balanced life. - A season of traveling the world by yourself can be on the path of balance.
- A season of sleeping 10 hours/day and spending most of your time talking with friends, or taking care of family, can lead to balance.
- And the path of balance can include following up several months of spiritual inactivity with a week of intermittent prayer and meditation.
Indeed, sometimes the best balance is no (apparent) balance at all
The point is that in the overall scheme of things, the seasons of life will balance each other out if you’re staying true to yourself. And I would argue that not immersing oneself in a season of life that’s calling you is to deny yourself balance.
Of course, you really can’t plan the seasons of life or quantify your balance (or lack thereof). The best you can do is to pay attention to your intuition and “consume” what you crave. That is, if you crave a meal containing nothing but fruit, then your body probably needs fruit. Likewise, if your imagination, creativity, and ingenuity won’t leave you alone, then you might really be craving a season of work (yes, we sometimes need meaningful work like we need air).
At any rate, living in seasons can be a more holistic approach to balance for many people. The only problem is that when we’re immersing ourselves in a season of life . . .
We Can Appear to Be Partly Insane
People who are fully and single-mindedly immersed in a season of their life can appear to be out of whack and sometimes quasi-insane. Your friends will think little of it if you stay up one night jotting down ideas, taking notes, and scheming. But if you stay up into the wee hours of the night for an entire month or two, then you may be seen as going off the deep end.
(For me, the “well-balanced” life feels like insanity; it feels regimented and contrived).
Your perceived insanity will be greatly amplified if you are being viewed from the eyes of someone who has known you for only one life season. And if you live a life of seasons, you may be perceived as a workaholic, a lazy bum, a socialite, a health nut, etc. during any one period of your life.
The truth, however, is that you’re probably all of these things and none of these things.
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Photos by TonyVC, Fort Photo, and Seb Przd.
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