The Best Hate Mail Message EVER

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In my last post I left you with a cliff hanger.  I wish I could say that I was using ninja NLP mind manipulation tactics to keep you wanting more, however the REAL reason I ended the article where I did was much more basic: it was beautiful outside I wanted to go skating with my people.

Anyway, I’ll address the cliffhanger tomorrow.

In the meantime I want to share with you . . .

The Best Hate Mail Message I’ve Ever Received

Ready?  Here it is (bear in mind that it was a reply to my last article).

wha tha fuck is this? no meat all potato? c’mon cal you stringing my ass along for some mo  yo empyty headed mid-west hay rider shit again, I’m still getting treatment from that last virus you sent me here…

so wha it is going on with you? you can’t have finance & freedom boy, like I done tole you last time fore you dropped off the www you askin toooooo much…. you can’t have it all jez like Deida  said (is he for real? or is his real a real  f.u. sex addict guru, misogynist, rubber hose- panties boy)

you jus like the stock market always fluctuating & masterbat….

-J.H.

I know this was probably supposed to piss me off, but it really just made my day.  Thanks for the note, J.

–Clay




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Facebook comments:

  • CarlNelson

    Fantastic. I think it's the funniest thing I've read all day.

  • CarlNelson

    Fantastic. I think it's the funniest thing I've read all day.

  • http://financialphilosopher.typepad.com/thefinancialphilosopher/ Kent @ Financial Philosopher

    The “hate mail” appears completely manufactured. No one spells “misogynist” correctly and has broken English at the same time. The email is still entertaining, although not in the way it was intended…Anyway, welcome back Clay — not that you were ever “gone” — it's just nice to have your voice present again.I just read your most previous post and wanted to offer my favorite “death” quote for you…”We say that the hour of death cannot be forecast, but when we say this we imagine that hour as placed in an obscure and distant future. It never occurs to us that it has any connection with the day already begun or that death could arrive this same afternoon, this afternoon which is so certain and which has every hour filled in advance.” ~ Marcel Proust

  • http://financialphilosopher.typepad.com/thefinancialphilosopher/ Kent @ Financial Philosopher

    The “hate mail” appears completely manufactured. No one spells “misogynist” correctly and has broken English at the same time. The email is still entertaining, although not in the way it was intended…

    Anyway, welcome back Clay — not that you were ever “gone” — it's just nice to have your voice present again.

    I just read your most previous post and wanted to offer my favorite “death” quote for you…

    “We say that the hour of death cannot be forecast, but when we say this we imagine that hour as placed in an obscure and distant future. It never occurs to us that it has any connection with the day already begun or that death could arrive this same afternoon, this afternoon which is so certain and which has every hour filled in advance.” ~ Marcel Proust

  • http://projectmojavesite.com/blog/ Clay Collins

    Dude, I couldn't make something up that good if I tried. Wish I were that creative.

  • http://projectmojavesite.com/blog/ Clay Collins

    Dude, I couldn't make something up that good if I tried. Wish I were that creative.

  • rewyred

    Shit u mean I didn't piss (on) u off? Fuck man, that's it! My back is truly broken now… I'm finished…. might as well take a walk on down to the Tallahassee Bridge & find the place where Billy Joe Mc Allister jumped…. You may have “thoughts of death” – you may enjoy these thought privately – and with a “lowdown dirty trick ” – you may send these thoughts to the entire human genome and re-tool YourTOOL(self) as the nu-internut eckart tolle of finc. Oprahs' new lapdog but it's just mo yo lip flip trip…. blah, blah,blah… nah nah nah nah- hey Financial Freedom goodbye…. blah, blah, blah….Chloe-when wuz duh last time u opened the business section of yo loco paper (or for that matter yo butt cheeks?)Claypot- whatever super duper nuclear financial advice u holding in your heel-0-shit is sorely needed, so stop fukin my ass & making Obama responsible. Du us all a flavour n' jest get on the blower cuzz now's the time to give 'er up budwad, Amuraka needs u to fix it's ass made in china 'nstesd uve Foxin it on FuckTV w/ Billoshit O'Riley…Fer chrissake man, ain't u neer heard it sayid befo, “freedom's jizz (iz )jess nuther wurd fer nuthing left to loose?” Look I got a nice bridge to dive off shortly cuzz I'm a walker not a talker like yo… so I'm gonna piss then make this as pimple 'n clear as I can … yuck can call it my final legacy to the human spitit….Financial & Freedom Whja t dodo u c? Thas right? Now do those words not look 'n smell totally allfull together Clem?Thas right son, u's thunkin now Play…Why?Cuzz…to even get any kind of Financial (pussy), what do u need to establish first? (it's gotta be sumthin other than dicksize)CREDIT! … that's right (good boy, have a liva snap…)Think hard now…watts another name for CREDIT? (and it's not porn) DEBT!.Now I think you can feel a little of what they call insight. That quick hot flash like a power shot of Fussian Radiator Vodke…Now u see what I tole you long time ago…What the fuck does DEBT!. have to do with FREEDOM??Yet you must have DEBT!. to have CREDIT? (… not porn) & round & round u ASS go. So ain't but one thing left to do & I be doing it cuzz I'm not all tied down with a ho & bich – gettin Flogged & Boned in BoogerTechnerd Conventions by fans who need me to blow 'em or marathons, or grieving over my lost fat ass, worrying whether or not I can ffitt it through the eye of a needle…fuck y'All, I'm outta her…ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

  • rewyred

    Shit u mean I didn't piss (on) u off? Fuck man, that's it! My back is truly broken now… I'm finished…. might as well take a walk on down to the Tallahassee Bridge & find the place where Billy Joe Mc Allister jumped…. You may have “thoughts of death” – you may enjoy these thought privately – and with a “lowdown dirty trick ” – you may send these thoughts to the entire human genome and re-tool YourTOOL(self) as the nu-internut eckart tolle of finc. Oprahs' new lapdog but it's just mo yo lip flip trip…. blah, blah,blah… nah nah nah nah- hey Financial Freedom goodbye…. blah, blah, blah….
    Chloe-when wuz duh last time u opened the business section of yo loco paper (or for that matter yo butt cheeks?)Claypot- whatever super duper nuclear financial advice u holding in your heel-0-shit is sorely needed, so stop fukin my ass & making Obama responsible. Du us all a flavour n' jest get on the blower cuzz now's the time to give 'er up budwad, Amuraka needs u to fix it's ass made in china 'nstesd uve Foxin it on FuckTV w/ Billoshit O'Riley…
    Fer chrissake man, ain't u neer heard it sayid befo, “freedom's jizz (iz )jess nuther wurd fer nuthing left to loose?”
    Look I got a nice bridge to dive off shortly cuzz I'm a walker not a talker like yo… so I'm gonna piss then make this as pimple 'n clear as I can … yuck can call it my final legacy to the human spitit….
    Financial & Freedom
    Whja t dodo u c?
    Thas right?
    Now do those words not look 'n smell totally allfull together Clem?
    Thas right son, u's thunkin now Play…Why?
    Cuzz…to even get any kind of Financial (pussy), what do u need to establish first? (it's gotta be sumthin other than dicksize)
    CREDIT! … that's right (good boy, have a liva snap…)
    Think hard now…watts another name for CREDIT? (and it's not porn)
    DEBT!.
    Now I think you can feel a little of what they call insight. That quick hot flash like a power shot of Fussian Radiator Vodke…
    Now u see what I tole you long time ago…
    What the fuck does DEBT!. have to do with FREEDOM??
    Yet you must have DEBT!. to have CREDIT? (… not porn) & round & round u ASS go.
    So ain't but one thing left to do & I be doing it cuzz I'm not all tied down with a ho & bich – gettin Flogged & Boned in BoogerTechnerd Conventions by fans who need me to blow 'em or marathons, or grieving over my lost fat ass, worrying whether or not I can ffitt it through the eye of a needle…
    fuck y'All, I'm outta her…
    ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

  • http://www.oddcorner.net tannage

    Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction! I despair for some people sometimes..

  • http://www.websmithgroup.com/blog KiShaw

    LOL. Too funny. Sounds like someone has a crush. Clay + J sitting in a tree … he only doing this because he loves you.

  • http://financialphilosopher.typepad.com/thefinancialphilosopher/ Kent @ Financial Philosopher

    Don't sell yourself short! Actually, I meant the originator of the comment obviously manufactured the misspelled words. I'd publish the comments as posts until the idiot stops commenting. If they don't stop, you'll have a whole new category of posts. If they do stop, the idiot will disappear.Either way, you're a winner!

  • http://financialphilosopher.typepad.com/thefinancialphilosopher/ Kent @ Financial Philosopher

    Don't sell yourself short! Actually, I meant the originator of the comment obviously manufactured the misspelled words. I'd publish the comments as posts until the idiot stops commenting. If they don't stop, you'll have a whole new category of posts. If they do stop, the idiot will disappear.

    Either way, you're a winner!

  • http://zixmailencryption.com/ zixmail

    well friend i read this and i think it is good!

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